Happy New Year...Happy New "ME"

Woohoo!!! Another year has passed...and it's been a roller coaster ride for me. I moved to a new country, met new friends, fell in love, fall out of love, got depressed, recovered, and now "planning" to move back to UAE...my comfort zone.

Well, im excited for 2009...i have a good feeling it will be more colorful...challenging and exciting for me.

My NY resolutions?!?...well, top on the list is to "detoxify"...i am avoiding saturated fats and sweets esp. chocolates. It's not just to detoxify, it's more of a personal sacrifice from indulging myself to pleasure eating. I love to eat meat...beef, pork, lamb, chicken...and that is why im gonna avoid them as a form of sacrifice and to detox myself from saturated fats...which i mainly sourced from those.

amnesia

i sufferred from self-imposed amnesia in the past few weeks...the best way i thought to forget everything that happened and to forcibly stop the pain....but i can't escape from it...i have to deal with it...he's gone...let go...move on.

but how do i start again?!?

focusing on my personal well-being

yesterday i went to a seminar about personal well-being...i'm really not that interested in the topic as i know very well how to deal with my own well-being...i just get bored in the office..sitting there the whole week so might as well put it into use.

well, we were asked as to write-down in a booklet how do we envision a great weekend...and what do we think hinders us from doing it. So I listed down simple things I’d love to do on a weekend.
1. Eat out in a fine-dining or cozy restaurant with a good/positive friend.
2. Just hang out in starbucks...have a coffee and chat.
3. Play sports/jog with a friend and end up sitting in a bench.

very simple activities indeed...but then there goes the obstacle: LOCATIONAL/SITUATIONAL

i ain't got my friends here...friends whom im gonna enjoy doing those simple things...is in it pathetic? huhuhu

OH NO wait...not really, God is always so good to me...He sent me an angel (or just a person with angelic face) today for me to accomplish no. 1 and no. 3.

That angel is in the form of my roomie…hehe

we went out playing badminton in the morning and then for lunch he treat me to a nice teppanyaki resto...so he just made my weekend as i would like it to be.

Mission accomplished angel. Woohoo!

then tomorrow, im heading down to Dublin for the first time to attend a 1-day seminar on Monday...so i'm gonna see my friends...arnel, mai, meldz, abby and dina.

the girls might be busy having their own plans on a Sunday night.

So I jz have a dinner plan with arnel…my so-called stepmom. then we will hit the bar later…it would be my first time since I got here…so u can call my baptismal…haha

And since I’ve been on a dry spell for so long...well..we’ll never know.*winks*

update...quite late...

well, yeah it's been a while...didn't blog for so long coz i feel like there's nothing much to share.

nweiz, i've been here in belfast for 2 1/2 months now...i thought i'm not gonna like it here during my first 3 days...as in i was so paranoid i even consider coming back to uae...be with my friends and be back in Deloitte which i love so much.

but then as expected life love me so much and in a matter of few days i'm already declaring I LOVE BELFAST...hehehe...or maybe i jz fall in love easily? is it? :P

randOm thoughts at 4 AM

It is so clear to me now that my life can easily get boring. The more i get comfortable, the more i feel the need to escape. I do enjoy the state of being complacent, but not for long. At a certain point, I feel the need to start anew. Starting over used to be a dreadful thought to me, but as i grow "older" and "wiser?!", it turns to be more appealing. The idea of being alone, lost and struggling again can be very challenging. Having the faith of getting through that challenging phase once more is really rejuvinating. Indeed, life struggles doesn't just strengthen us...it also renews our faith...and makes our journey worthwhile.

***

There is something missing in my life and i have this urge to continually search for it. I am not sure what it is and where to find it but I'm certain it isn't here. I might have missed "that something" but I found a handful of good friends here and that is something so precious I will always be grateful for. Having them made it all easier for me and being with them is the first thing I'm surely gonna miss. I want to believe that nothing will change but me being absent physically. I want to hope that we will always keep in touch...that no one will forget. But if the memories begin to fade and promises have been broken, I can still say love and friendship were never wasted...coz they already marked their spot in my heart...and it is something irreplaceable.

***

I do believe that being "complete" doesn't necessarily mean you have to have that one person in your life or to have that something your heart desires. I actually doubt if people really do feel complete at a certain point in his life. The world offers all kinds of superficial things that could bring happiness but never completeness. Maybe we will only feel complete when our journey is over. When we can finally look back and say we lived our life the best we can and there's nothing more we can do about it. Completeness could be when our mind stopped thinking...and our heart stopped wanting...and that is only when we stopped breathing and finally surrendered our soul back to HIM.

***

i went for a blind date last night...courtesy of my friends here led by rico. the "boy" was really cute...and a real good soul.

one of the few moments...

jz got home from shopping with my bestgayfriend rico. it was exhausting yet worth cherishing...coz it's one of the few moments my bestfriend decided (by force) to spare some of his precious time with me. we've been together here in UAE for over a year now but it's only 3 0r 4 times we went shopping together...why?!?...he just hates me when it comes to malling...or maybe not just in malling but in most of the things...well he's really my bestfriend...duh! no reason to doubt right?!

nweiz, i got my first parka coat...u know getting ready for my upcoming move to Belfast. i bought some winter stockings too...and betcha i got one in pink. i realized that in no time half of my wardrobe will be in pink. :)